Luzon #1: New Synopsis & Outline Notes…

January 25

The original synopsis ended up covering both book 1 and book 2 (since I figured out that I had to split the book in half), so I figured it was past time to update it:


Young Ormryche Olenekson was raised to be the Lord of Luzon, like his father before him, serving King and Queen in dark times. But his life takes a very different turn when his magegift awakens. Together with the Lady Evelan, they study with the Mage Karlon and seek to master their new power. But with power comes responsibility, and they are thrust into the forefront of the battles against the Shadows rising in the land…

Went to add it to the WIP Manager, but that already had the premise work I did for this in A&B style:

Young Ormryche Olenekson has been raised to be the heir to the Luzon fiefdom. His father passes down the Luzon sword to him, declaring him a man, as the King comes to visit for hunting season. During the hunt, Ormryche uses magic to stop assassins from killing the King. Mage Karlon, who was present, convinces the King and Lord Olenek that Ormryche’s gift is too strong to be left untrained, and the two leave Luzon to arrange for further guards to be sent to the King.

After visiting Culloden Castle, they travel to Amunsden to retrieve Evelen, daughter of Lord Sangar, who is also to be trained. Together, the three of them confront and defeat dark warriors as they travel to the magehall Sentry, and begin their studies in magic. After some time in training, they call their familiars… who shock the mage Council of Twelve by not only being great cats (the snow leopard Martel and the puma Tawny) with the capability for true mindspeech, but also with magical abilities as well.

After the familiars being investigated and confirmed by the envoys of the Council, they travel to Culloden upon news that an assassination attempt against Lord Olenek has failed… apparently instigated by Lord Sangar. Banding together, the two lords and the mages manage to unravel a dark plot at court and expose the guilty.

Evelan and Ormryche grow closer in their time together, and bond further when they both become Journeyman mages and travel the lands with Karlon, visiting members of the Three Races. They seek further information on a prophecy that Karlon believes affects them, involving the Lost Fourth Race. Amongst the elven Shee d’Esti family of Karlon’s late wife, they realize a larger plot is in process, and return to Culloden to unmask a conspiracy that has kept the Queen barren and civil war a threat to the nation. Dark forces rise as the plot is foiled, and march upon Culloden in reprisal. They are defeated, but grievous word comes afterwards: most of the Council of Twelve has been assassinated while the battle was waged.

Some notes on the outline, things that I want to change:

When I sub’d the initial chapter to Fantastic Byways ages ago, and deRien commented that I should:

show emotions with associations, body language, reactions

When talking about re-arc’ing the story with and Fool (), I decided that Avara’s bareness barenness was the central conflict in book 1:

change ch 1: avara and laoura talk about barenness and the problems of the house, showing avara in a more motherly light
add ch 4: evelan and karlon talk about avara
add ch 4: evelan writes letter to avara
add ch 6: avara writes evelan

Other misc notes from myself and :

remember that as O&E advance in studies that instinct will become less important
make ormryche less perfect (no Mary-Sue’ing allowed)
start of the book: Uturik visits Luzon because it’s Ormryche’s Naming Day, which is why he leads the hunt rather than Zian
draw out the attraction / tension between Evelan and Ormryche
focus less on the lessons and more on the interactions between the characters
dont forget the familiars; involve them and make them drive the plot the same as the other characters (after all, they ARE characters, too)



Posted by on January 25, 2006 in Luzon

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